Daily fluctuations

I'm getting used to the whole maintenance thing. I'm still trying to get used to the idea that that's really me in the mirror, but it's fun. I am weighing myself every morning, which is probably not a great idea, it's a bit obsessive. But I'm sure I'll lighten up as I settle into my new routine. My weight is going between 142 and 146 pounds. Daily fluctuations are normal, so it's not a problem. I'll just keep an eye on the range. Food has been good this week, as has exercise. I've been in the green with my daily allowance, and running has been fun.

I ran sixty kilometers this week, twenty-two and half (fourteen miles) of which was this morning. I've come to realize that it takes me about three miles to warm up, and for the kinks to be worked out of my achilles, calf and hip. Then it's great for about nine miles, before it all starts to ache again. My endureance is definately improving though. And my times are so much better than last time. Today's run took two and a half hours. Last time I did that distance it took about three hours fifteen minutes. That's just down to weight loss.

Today's run. Very happy with the pace, even though I was very tired and a bit achey by the end.

My time for a similar distance two years ago, weighing 209lb, according to mfp records. So I was nearly five stone heavier thatn I am now. Big difference!

I'm loving it. I'm not saying that the idea of running fifteen miles next week fills me with joy. I sort of dread these long runs, while anything under ten miles, I do genuinely look forward to. But I know that I can survive the longer ones, and I feel better for having done them. I can't believe I'm a person who genuinely looks at their GPS and thinks, "It takes me three miles to warm up," or "Only seven kilometers to go!"

I drank better today, sipped a little more consistantly, so took on more fluid. I also used the jelly meerkat sweets as my fuel. I worked out that I'd need about 170g to provide about 120g of carbs. I ended up only eating 100g, but I'm still getting used to fueling on the hoof, so I can work on getting enough in me over the next eight weeks. I can't believe that that's my training schedule half done. Just fifty-seven days to go! Eek!

My shoes took a bit of a batttering today. As I ran off the road to the coastal path, I ended up running through some quite wet and muddy ground. It made me realize that I might actually quite enjoy trail running. My poor wee toesie shoes need a wash though. Mind you, then I ran through some puddles, and it seemed to rinse the worst of the mud off. The Vibrams are brilliant when they get wet. The water drains out of them, so while they stay wet, there's no accumulated puddle in each shoe.

Thank goodness they are machine washable!

We went out for brunch afterwards. TMM had a lie in while I ran. It was extra nice as we are both now off for a week. We are basking in the "NO Work For A Week" zone!

Just keep running, just keep running...

...as Dory from "Finding Nemo" would sing. Well, if she had legs instead of fins. It's been a good week for running so far, and it's not over yet. 

This morning's run. Happy that I am consistently staying under 7 min/km.

At least one run left to do, a long one of 17km, or about eleven miles in old money. It should take about two hours. I haven't decided if I will do it tomorrow evening or Sunday morning yet. TMM is working on both. I'll wing it, see how I feel. I should be out for a walk with Mum in the morning, so I mightn't fancy a long run as well on the same day.

I did it again. I bought more Vibram runners. That's the third pair now. I have to stop. I can't help it. I'm a suggestible nightmare, an advertizer's dream! Ads come up at the side of my email and I make the mistake of looking at them! And if Vibrams are going to be sold at £50, how am I reasonably supposed to not buy them ??? I track the mileage of my shoes on my Runkeeper app, and to do that, I have a name for each pair. The first Vibrams, I called Toesies. The second pair are Pinkerton. I can honestly make an argument for reasonably having two pairs. If one pair's in the wash for example. But three? That's why I've named this pair "The Unnecessaries" :-)

The best pair yet. Love them.

I've been weighing heavy all week, but I'm trying not to care because my running has been great and I know I've been eating well. My calorie balance has been good and I know I'm in the green. So I'm going to keep hoping for a loss on Sunday. I'm also happy because I've started a bit of knitting in the evenings, so that's keeping my occupied, and away from snacking. I'm making a Dr Who scarf. I reckon it'll be finished by the end of the weekend. It's a short project (but a very long scarf!) so I might start something else once I'm done. 

I'm not doing this exactly, using different sized needles and wool, but it's a good rough guide. I'll probably make it about twelve foot long. That's long enough for any five foot two short arse :-)

Addicted to shopping

I'm gonna have to stop. I've already had to put aside a couple of pairs of trousers that I bought very recently because they are now too big, and barring last year's Christmas jumpers, and the odd thing of TMM's that I wear because it smells like him, I refuse to wear stuff that's too big anymore. It's all very well that I bought a few clothes as I got smaller. I needed them. But I have to stop now, at least till my body has settled at where it's going to stay. Running shoes? I can justify those (well, that's what I tell myself :-D )

Second pair of toesy running shoes. Light and comfy. And nice in pink.

The acid test will be when I go in to town after work today. I really have to start my present shopping! If I can go in to Primark without buying myself something, then I'll consider it a success.

I guess it's understandable. I'm excited about how I look in clothes these days, so it's hard to rein myself in. But I need to. It's a terrible waste of money otherwise.

Food's been on track this week. I'm happy to have stayed within allowance, given I'm not running and earning extra cals at the mo. I'm actually pretty impressed that I rested this morning too. I'll probably run on Monday again, and stick to circuits and walking till then. It's all good. I have an ache in my abs at the moment because of all the planking, sit ups and crunches. It's a good ache. I like it, even though it hurts to laugh :-)

I know I've said it before, but this feeling of all over wellness is amazing. The idea that I can just go out the front door and walk for an hour, without it killing me, is fantastic. I can throw on running shoes and run six miles, just like that. It's not fast, but it's totally, absolutely doable. I can do sit ups and push ups and not have a heart attack! So I have a bit (well, okay, a lot) of saggy skin. And I'm still heavier than a BMI chart says I should be. Damn! Who cares?

I feel brilliant and TMM thinks I'm a wee star. Life is fab!

Water torture

You know that torture? The one where they talk about a drip of water hitting your forehead. Nothing too torturous about that, right? Except that it goes on constantly, drip, drip, drip on the forehead, for hours if necessary. It's said to drive you mad eventually. I don't know it such a thing ever existed as a practice, or if it's apocryphal, but that's how I feel about the chocolates that are in my office at the moment. The boss sets them out, in a bowl, at Christmas, for customers. It's Quality Street or Celebrations. And there they sit, calling to me, all day. For some reason, they are different to the bags of sweets that sit in a box, to buy for a pound, for charity. Those, I can ignore, nearly all of the time. I'm inured to them sitting there. The Quality Street? Not so much. Perhaps because I could just lift one if I fancied, rather than a whole bag. But I know that I couldn't stop at one. So I feel as if my resistance to them gets worn away a little drip at a time. This year, I have serious motivation behind me. I don't want to spoil my good weight loss record, so hopefully that will keep me away from spontaneous Quality Street eating. There's nowt wrong with a bit of planned, quality Quality Street time. In fact, it should be mandatory to have a treat of some sort, so long as I control the circumstances, not the other way around.

I saved my cals to try the full fat halloumi from this week's grocery delivery for tea tonight. It was fairly calorific, (what did I expect? It's cheese!) but tasty.  Salty goodness. I grilled it over roasted parsnip chips, made to use up three parsnips before they shrivelled up. It was nice. It's a squeaky food though, as in, it's mouth feel is a touch odd and it does actually squeak.  You can hear and feel it in your mouth as you eat it. So if that sort of thing squicks you (as it would TMM) then this is not a food for you. Me, I liked it well enough, but now my curiosity is satisfied, so I doubt that I'll get it again. Especially as it is so calorie laden.

On the running front, I'm such a sucker for advertizing. I'm the dream market for all those focused ads that appear on line, geared towards my buying history on amazon and my search history. It's quite fightening that such things exist, yet I don't fight it too hard. When an ad popped up for Vibrams at £57, I snapped them up. It's a good price, and if I keep running at teh rate I am, I will need some in a couple of months anyway. They should see me through to the marathon (if I do it.)  I think I mentioned a day or two ago, there's already over 170km on first pair. These are more girlie in appearance, very pink! They should arrive in the middle of next week.

I haven't told TMM that there are yet more running shoes on their way to me. But then, I haven't told him that I've signed up to next year's Belfast Marathon either. He worries when I'm out very early, before work, running high mileage. When I ran the marathon last year (depending on how loosely we define the word "ran") he couldn't get his head around the distances I was doing, especially on my long training run, which I always did on a Saturday morning. I had a look at a couple of training programmes, one particularly on Runkeeper. It's a sixteen week one, so I don't have to start it until the 9th or 10th of January to take me to Mon 1st May. I have until then to decide if I'm going to do it. And just to keep the panic in the forefront of my mind, the official website has a countdown!

Tough in parts this week

It's been a few days, so an update is due. I'm having my first sneak peek free week (sneak, peek, week! I'm a poet, and I didn't know it!) in ages, so I genuinely have no idea where my weight is going this week. I've been tracking everything as usual, and despite my best intentions, I've eaten the majority of my exercise cals. I always intend to only eat half, so that way, I eat a little more to fuel my added activity, but keep a few in the bank, to spur on the weight loss. I'm a bit annoyed with myself for not having the will power to stick to that plan. Then I get annoyed with myself for being needlessly annoyed with myself. Confused? You will be :-)

I'm no dozer. I know it's okay to eat what I've earned. And it'a a darn site better to eat what I've earned, than to eat what I haven't earned. And it's certainly better to eat what I've earned rather than to go hungry, just for the sake of my pride, so I can say to myself, "Oh, look at me, aren't I great? Look at all the exercise calories I haven't used!" all the while, resenting the fook clean out of TMM, who's happily chomping away on a 200g bar of chocolate, or a full packet of custard creams, or a full tub of prawn cocktail pringles! So, I do know it's better to eat the earned cals than to sit and suffer. That way lies the destruction of all my good work, coz I know I'll go boogaloo and eat all round me. That would entail a litre tub of Pooh Bear ice cream, some stuffed chicken olives, Cumberland sausage and a cream bun or four! At least! Maybe not necessarily in that order, but who knows? I may have given this all a bit too much thought :-) I just want to be on my guard against exercising to earn calories and using the extra cals as an excuse to overeat.

Since the start of the week, I've found it hard to hold back on cravings, especially for savoury things. It's been a bit better today. Is it a monthly thing? Don't know. I made sure to have a decent breakfast the last couple of days, and that's definitely helped. Today I had scrambled eggs and smoked fish. a) Delicious! b) Very filling. I love me some eggs for breakfast!

Anyway, as it pans out, so far, I'm breaking even this week, cals wise, so it's not been a bad week. Exercise wise, I've been positively angelic. I ran every morning before work, bar Monday, when I took a break, having run Saturday and Sunday.

I'm happy to be consistently getting up early and getting out on the street, so I'm not overly worried about pace. I think I'm more about distance at the mo. I'm going to slowly increase my long runs. I have till the New Year to decide if I want to train for the Belfast Marathon again, and I can comfortably do six miles at the mo, so there's no hurry to decide. I don't know if I could be arsed with the commitment it would take. It would be four solid months, building up to going for runs that would last four hours or more. If I do the marathon again, I'll want to do it below five hours, which is an hour and a half quicker than my first attempt in 2015.

Belfast Marathon 2015. Can't believe I completed 26.2 miles!

Race day next year is Monday 1st May 2017. It's not that far away. I'm thinking about it seriously.

I've been running in the toesie shoes for about four weeks now, and I'm well used to them. I love the feel of them as I run.They are extremely comfortable. I did notice that I'm prone to blisters on my sole near the bunion on my left foot, but judicious application of a half strip of K T tape has stopped that. However, I read this week about changing my gait a little and I made a very simple adjustment. I literally just became aware of splaying my toes as I run. I don't remember to do it all the time, but I do it enough that it will eventually become a habit. It seems to have made a difference, even in the couple of days that I've been doing it. With the toes in these shoes being individually pocketed, there's loads of room for them to wriggle about. I've nearly forty-eight years of conventional shoe wearing conditioning (that's not a phrase I ever thought I'd say!) to overcome,  but I really think these weirdo "feet", as my Mum calls them, are the way to go. Honestly, my left knee feels better than it has done for years. Goodness knows what, of the many things I'm doing, is helping. Taking the cinnamon with coconut oil in my coffee in the morning, or the ibuprofen, with the anti inflammatory properties, the K T tape, the shoes or let's not forget seven stone of weight loss, which certainly can't hurt. It could be any, all or none of the above. But whatever, I'm going to keep doing what I'm doing. 

              

Check out my new hoodie :-)

Jean-Luc Picard rocks!!!

I've been wearing a jumper and hoodie under coat in work this week. The temperature has dropped a bit. And I and still didn't look like Michelin Man.

Whose actual name is Bibendum, in a bit of tyre related trivia.  Oh, the interesting job I have!.

Saturday

I got a sneaky run in this morning. I was determined to have a rest day, but once TMM went to work, I couldn't help myself. I just really fancied a run. So on went the Vibrams (have I mentioned that I love them?) and for the first time in months, I went out with out having KT taped. I won't make a habit of that, coz I like the security of being taped up. Not just that, but my new tape arrived the other day, so I have loads of it to use. I'm going to play it safe and keep taping up my left knee and my right foot. This tape is very pretty. I do love my green and pink combo. This time, the pink is camo!  

It's been said that the Vibram shoes are to simulate barefoot running. So I can run barefoot in the streets without the dog shit. Hmm, it was a close thing today. There seem to have been a lot of people in my area who let their canine charges use the foot path as a doggie toilet. How bloody rude! I did manage to avoid it. My shoes remain dog shit-less. 

I took myself around the coast for my run this morning. How lovely. Aren't I a lucky so and so!

I managed quite a good time. I ran just over 6k, but at the 5k mark, I was on just over thirty-five minutes. Over all, my pace was just about a seven minute kilometre. That's not too bad, given my lack of running over the past year and a half.

I was sweatier this morning than yesterday too. Due to working harder perhaps?

I think it's fair to say that my love of running is back. Like many things, I'm not going to take it for granted. But I am enjoying the fact that I ran five times this week.

I had a lovely afternoon with TMM. We went for a late lunch, which was very welcome as I hadn't eaten much after my run and shower. We had a leisurely meal. The usual fry up, which I have saved as a "meal" on mfp so I don't need to track all of the constituent parts each time.  It works out at about 900 cals. High, yes. But my main meal of the day. Even though we do it regularly (usually once a week) eating out with TMM always feels like an occasion. I just enjoy that we go out in each others company And I love that we can eat out together. I can have what I want, and count it on my tracker. Okay, I do have to be more careful than I'd be naturally, hence my weight gain, but it's totally do-able. Like I said, massive fry up with the love of my life? Love it! 

Today I did a massive wardrobe clearout. And now I have ten bin bags worth of stuff to be thrown out/given to charity shop/recycled. I also went through the bags of things that I'd cleared away a few years ago. I got rid of lots of it, but I found a few jumpers that I loved from that time, so they are in the wash as we speak. I can't wait to wear them again. I did a huge tidy up and now my wardrobe is beautiful. Even my DMs are sitting pretty.

For the first time, I think ever, since moving in to this house, all my clothes are in the one place. They are all in the bedroom. I've really streamlined them. That said, I still have too many clothes! So no shopping till I'm at target. By that stage, I will be smaller and hopefully I will need to throw more jeans and tops out. That was my criteria in this clear out. Anything too big, that looked baggy, went out. That's a lot of shit to dump, when you've been buying clothes to accommodate at least twenty-five years of your life spent over weight. Ten black bags Dude! Seriously!

I found the old pair of jeans that I keep to remind me how big I got. They are not the biggest size I ever wore.  I'm pretty sure I was growing out of size twenty-six at one point. These are an ASDA size twenty-four. It felt good to try them on. TMM had a go too. It put me in good form for my weigh in tomorrow :-)

Too in your face?

No one has made any such comment. I haven't had any thing negative said to me, in fact, quite the opposite. I've only had positivity and support from friends, family and readers alike. Every now and then though, I feel a bit guilty about the way I keep bumming and blowing about how good it feel, how well my weight loss is going or how great clothes look on me now. I worry about it a little. I know how annoying it can be to hear someone rattle on about how brill they are doing, when my own weight loss attempts have gone to shit and I feel like fuck all beat up in a cup. So I really don't want to be having that affect on someone. I sincerely hope there's someone who can get the opposite reaction, i.e. "Wow, if she can do it, so can I."  

Despite fearing that my current ebullient mood is off putting, I can't write about anything else. It's how I feel. I feel bloody good, with a massive side helping of gratitude that something in my tiny mind clicked, and allowed this attempt to flourish. I've lost and regained weight enough times to know that I can't take this situation for granted. And every time I hear of someone struggling, I feel it's there but for the grace of God. So please, excuse my exuberance. It's not meant to be bombastic for the sake of it. I'm just so excited!

Now, that said, here I go again. 

 

Good run this morning. A bit faster.

I really enjoyed a run this morning. I did what I wanted to after yesterday's run. I went a little quicker and got my fastest 5k time in this running incarnation. About thirty-seven minutes. Cool. I'm happy with that. For now :-) One of the best things was how un-sweaty I was afterwards. I was still sweaty, but no where near what I've been previously. It's a combination of a cooler morning and being lighter and a bit fitter, I'm sure. But I can see it in photos I've taken.

Post run, 13th August.

 Post run, this morning. Feeling positively skinny. No where near my usual puce colour!

I'm going to have a day or two off running. I want to rest my legs, having used the Vibrams two days in a row now. Feet are still feeling good though. I did buy some Heelys though. Now that's some wacky. fun shit. I had to google how to use them! Then TMM came home from work to find me cooking dinner last night, heelying up and down the kitchen tiles. Not amused! "I've just got over worrying about you pulling a hamstring using those shoes (he's not a fan of the Vibrams) and now I come home to this? You're not wise!" Teehee. Sure, it keeps him on his toes. Or is that me? Or heels? Ahh, I'm confused :-)

Such fun!

 I'm not going to my mum's this evening, so I have complete control of my food. I feel a sausage casserole of some sort coming on.

Results are in!

I gave in. I couldn't help it. TMM bet me that I would, and indeed, he knows me very well. There was no way I was going to wait four weeks to acclimatize my feet to my Vibram running shoes. I wore them about the house for a couple of hours yesterday and the day before. TMM wouldn't let me wear them to his folks' house because he said I'd be burnt as a witch!

I went for a run this morning and did 5k in them, Wow, they're different. It's distinctly odd to feel the ground so clearly through the soles. I can't lie, I was worried (possibly still am, a little) about the total lack of cushioning/shock absorption, but the logic is that, before we wore shoes, our bodies evolved to be able to run and walk without them. All I have to do is get my feet and legs used to it. Because the Vibrams use different calve muscles (their website informs me) it might take a short while for my legs to strengthen up. But the girl I know who uses them has never had a problem. So, ever the optimist, I'll assume that I won't either.

While running, my pace was a little slower than my Monday and Tuesday runs. I was being quite careful to not strike the ground too hard. I felt lighter on my feet. My 5k was done in about thirty-nine minutes. Yeah, Paula Radcliff is safe. If I have no undue aches and pains tomorrow morning, I'll do the same distance and try to run at the slightly faster pace, and see how I get on.

I was pleased that I managed to get them on at 5.20am. There's no doubt that they are fiddly, in comparison to traditional gutties, but it's just a matter of me learning to wiggle my toes into the correct toe pockets. My big toe on each foot is clearly very fond of my second toe, as they both try very hard to join that toe in the second pocket. But once fitted correctly, they are so cosy and snug. I love how they feel. And there's absolutely no rubbing between the toes.

My major surprise was that I had no knee pain (left knee) and no upper foot pain (right foot) after or during the run. These are the areas that I use K T Tape on, and they usually niggle while I run. No out and out pain, but just a wee shout out every now and again to remind me they're there. Not today though. Hmmm! Coincidence? A few more runs will be necessary to check that out. But it's definitely a good sign. And then, when I was walking to the train station afterwards, my legs weren't tired at all. In fact, they felt refreshed! Go figure. It could be psychosomatic, but I don't care. If it works, coolaboola!

I was very hungry afterwards, so had some breakfast for a change. I had three eggs, scrambled in the microwave. Low in calorie, but very satisfying. I genuinely wasn't hungry again until after 1pm. I had a handful of the sugar free wine gums that I had delivered from Amazon. So far, they haven't caused too much devastation in my bowel area (though TMM did complain of circus tent-like smells in the bedroom) and they are really like real wine gums, so no complaints about them.

Such fun!

Oh, life is fab. I'm going to see Sean Lock tonight after work. I can't wait for the show. He's very funny. TMM and I both like him and love going to live comedy. It will be preceded by the minefield that is eating out, with its many pitfalls, but I've plenty of calories to use and I earned 500 this morning with my four mile run. Yes, I am preening as I write that. Big Smug McSmug, who came first in a smug competition, in Smugland. And to add to the joy, TMM and I are both off work tomorrow, so there's no rush to get home to have to get up early tomorrow. It feels decadent to be off mid week. Like we're playing hookie. 

The day continued in the good vein in which it started, despite the train running very late. It was really busy, and due to its lateness, and while it got packed, I wasn't taking up more than my share of hte space. Nor was I sweating as it got warm. It's the little things (like my bum now!) that make me smile.

My run is another reason I think life is great. I ran for almost fifty minutes. Mo Farrah has nothing to worry about, but man! I enjoyed it. And I'm chuffed that I ran for the second day in a row. And then, icing on the cake. My new shoes arrived. A day early. I can't wait to try them out.

Aren't they fabulously weird! They come with instructions! And not just, "Stick your feet in and run," type instructions. I'm supposed to get used to them slowly, as they make you use different muscles to the ones I normally use. I hope I have the patience. Oh, what am I saying? No way I'll do that. It even says to wear them only in the house for the first week or two, then only wear them for 10% of my work out. I'll give it to the end of tomorrow before I'm chomping at the bit to get out in them.