I was thinking about how I didn't eat till I got home after the funeral yesterday. Sometimes it's the best way for me to remain in control. If I eat something, like when Mum offered me biscuits or chicken legs yesterday, all that does is set of a desire to eat more. I'm genuinely better off if I can just go hungry. If I can make myself abstain, then I can be in control when I do eat. Of course, I have to remain in control and not overeat when I do eventually consume something. There is always the danger that I'll go mental and over do it.
Today, I had my tea at Mum's and it was easy enough to eat well as it was a buffet style meal. Lots of cold meats, low fat pate and salad. I know I'm well within my cals allowance today. Actually, I've felt great today. I'm in size 18 jeans and a tee shirt, which make me feel as if I look normal. And I'm wearing a cardigan that TMM gave me, one of his, that a few months ago would not have come close to fitting me.
I'm feeling a bit windy today. Maybe it's the quorn chilli.
This week, I want to lose four pounds. I'm surfing the crimson tide, so it probably won't happen, but if it did, it would take me to over five stone list and under 190lbs. How's that for two mini goals?
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